New from Sterm: Winger The Pinball Machine. One of the greatest and most iconic rock bands of all time now has a Pinball Machine. The machine has the newest and most advanced technology that has ever been put in a pinball. Some say it rivals the likes of NASA and the military. With features like "She's Only 17" multi-ball (Which has 17 Pinballs on the Play Field) and "Miles Away Multiplier" this will be the most advanced pinball machine ever. The long overdue pinball machine will be released this summer to the public, and already has a long waiting list for pre-orders. A few machines have been released to certain locations to create a buzz and get feedback.
Jack, from Jersey Jack pinball said "This is the greatest pinball machine I ever played, I wish I thought of it myself. I actually started selling The Winger along side my WOZ and Hobbit machines" (The above picture is Jack and Jason Sudeikis expressing their love for each other and the Winger Pinball Machine.)
The Silverball Museum in Asbury Park New Jersey said "Out of the 200 machines we have on the floor, Winger has been our most popular ever. People line up out the door and even call in advance to make sure they can play it."
One night a riot broke out on the boardwalk because the line got so long to play. Governor Chris Christie had to take time away from dinner and come down personally to quell the violence. The Museum went on to say that now you have to make a reservation a week in advance in order to play the game. Governor Christie said he felt that Winger was always the superior band when compared to Bruce Springsteen, and is considering honoring Winger with their own day in New Jersey. (Above picture is Governor Christie fighting off rioters who have not been able to play.)
Todd, from TNT Amusement in Pennsylvania said "I used to be a Winger Groupie, I followed them around everywhere. The Winger Pinball Machine has given me a new life. My phone rings all day about this machine, I don't even have time to go to Pizza Hut"
He went on to say "I feel like I'm part of history, I'm like the George Washington of pinball"
Experts are saying that Winger will revive the American arcade back to 1980s. When coins overfilled the cash box, Kids stole money from their parents and local deviants had a place to pretend they did something before Starbucks. Make sure you order your Winger Pinball Machine today. At a bargain price of $24,999 they are sure to go fast.
This is a satire website. Any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental, except for all references to politicians and/or celebrities, in which case they are based on real people, but still based almost entirely in fiction.